I just realized that the last time I updated this blog was Jan of 2011 and now its Jan 2012. It’s amazing how time flies and how I’ve neglected this space for a long time. I shall not dwell on the reason’s why because its pointless at this time.
Anyways, it’s a whole new year and although I haven’t been writing here, I have been writing quite a bit. So here is what I wrote for the new year.
“The year 2011 has been like a roller coaster ride for me. Emotionally. The year began full of excitement and anticipation. It has been kind to me but also cruel to me. It showed me what it was like to fall in love and be swept off my feet. It showed me moments that filled me with awe and wonder. It showed me what it feels like for time to stand still and wishing that moment would not end. It showed me my accomplishment and hard work being paid off.
Besides the good stuffs, It did give me hard lessons to learn. It thought me that life is a never-ending learning process. It’s filled with disappointment and hurt but you should never let it overcome you. It brings grief and bad news and it teaches you that tomorrow might not be possible to some people or even to yourself. It thought me to grow up and not take shit from people.
It thought me there are many different kinds of friendships, some good, some bad and some that still leaves a question mark in your head. It thought me to see that everybody has flaws and the world is not perfect. But it’s how you yourself make it to be is what brings happiness and joy to yourself and those around you. It’s not always easy. Too many pent-up emotions, too many unnecessary dramas and too many jumping to conclusions without thinking rationally. It’s all jumbled up and as you begin to let it go, it comes out wrongly or you hurt the person you love the most without realizing it.
Unsolved issues of the past came back haunting and taking it out on someone is somehow always the first choice but never the right one. Many mistakes made, many tears shed, many unkind words said and many actions regretted. But that’s part of learning and growing up isn’t it? The many times you fall, just makes you stronger as you pick yourself up again. It’s never easy but optimism gets you further than negativity would in a million years. With that being said, I hope the new year brings me more hard lesson to learn but I also hope that I can deal with the issues I’m dealing with in a more calm manner and not pull others into it. I also hope the coming year would bring me closer to God. Something I really need to work hard on”
This was something I wrote before the year ended. And as soon as the year started I was smacked in the face with reality. Don’t get me wrong, it started off with a bang and I still think it’s gonna be a good year for me. Just did not expect that as soon as I turned 24, I was going to be facing my greatest challenge so far. Remember the hard lesson that I hope I would face earlier on? Well it’s happening in all its glory now. I am forced to make a life altering decision that could shape my entire future differently.
Although I haven’t quite made up my mind on what my next step is going to be and I’m still weighing in all the options available to me but I’m looking at it optimistically. There were times where I felt like crap but when I pray, He assures me that everything is going to be fine. Right now I’ve come to a complete stop at a dead-end but I believe that He would create a new pathway for me. He said so himself. Whatever my decision is at the end of the day, I hope.. No.. I KNOW that it would turn out to be great. With Him by my side, I’m taking this challenge head on and I’ll embrace whatever the future holds for me. Taking it one day at a time but I do believe that my dreams will become a reality. It’s just that I’ve got to take the hard way but I think I’ll gain more out of this than I ever would. There is a reason for everything. So here’s to the New Year, to my first challenge and to the future. Cheers! =)
